June 19, 2009

Oh look. It's a ghost. Yawn.

Do any of you watch and enjoy the T.V. shows Ghosthunters, Ghost Adventures, or The Scariest Places On Earth? If so, sorry if I offend you with what I am about to say. First of all, I don't believe in ghosts, so that's part of my disdain for these shows, but not only that, these shows don't even provide a cheap thrill! They're actually more comedies than anything that's thrilling!
I hate these dumb shows with all my heart! These shows are ridiculous! They are dumb. (Have I said dumb enough?)
Let me count the ways these shows are dumb for each dumb show. Maybe you'll agree or nod your head with a knowing-"yeah that guy is telling it like it is about those f#$^% up, sh!#@ headed, mother@$%^&% shows." Well, maybe you won't say it exactly like that, but something along those lines. Well here goes. I am stating my case.

Ghosthunters: (My wife likes to watch Ghosthunters so I try not to make fun of it too much in front of her!)

1. When Joe the Plumber lookalike Jason Hawes says with a straight face, "this may be a residual haunting" to some homeowner, that's just.....dumb. Residual haunting....

2. When Grant Wilson says "This is an EVP. (Electronic Voice Phenomenon) This will record any supernatural voices that our human ears will not pick up." I would love to be on the set to tell him, "Yeah right!" "That's probably your 2 year-old playing with his toys, and that other noise is Jason taking a crap!"

3. The show is horribly edited-It's choppy as hell. Homeowners with "ghosts" are asked something about their experiences with "their" ghosts, at the beginning or the end of the segment, so they give them about a minute or two to talk, then baldy and greasy will cut them off, by jumping out of their seats and say, "ok lets set up," or will shake their hand at the end of segment. It seems all interactions on this show are like this. Even the ghosts are cut off. They could be experiencing a lot of "phenomena," but still, Joe the Plumber and Grant will tell everyone to start packing up-they gotta go! Caspar be damned.

The Scariest Places on Earth:
1. hosted by Linda Blair and narrated by Zelda Rubinstein of Poltergeist fame-Zelda tries to sound scary, but really-those voiceovers of hers! They make her sound like she just got up from a long nap! And poor Linda sounds tired and in need of a nap!

2. The "scary" parts consist of showing people's faces, filmed with nightvision lenses, screaming about something they just heard and which the TV audience does not hear. "Arrrgh! Did you hear that?!" (no we didn't) "Oh God! Did you just hear THAT?!" (again we didn't hear THAT either) That's pretty much it-just repeat that 10 times.

Ghost Adventures:
Boy-imaginative title huh? This one is the worst in my opinion. It consists of an idiot (Zak Bagans) yelling at ghosts with his stupid, greasy, shitty hair. "Hey dude-ghost! Come on out and fight like a real ghost, dude!" This guy is irritating! Most of the time, Bagans will hear something that only he can hear, or be tapped on the shoulder (very convienient that only Zak seems to get tapped or nudged by ghosts!) He'll jump up and shout "Dude! Did you just hear that?!" Most of the time no one has, but sometimes there is the faint sound of something, maybe someone's stomach growling.

This blog did an excellent job of describing this show and Bagans-and I concur wholeheartedly, so I will let you click the link to check it. His description of Mr. Bagans is perfect. (the description of this show is about 1/2 way down the article) C'mon, Ghost! Wait, Wait, I Didn't Mean It! - Sheldon The ...

I would love to see a parody of these shows... oh, wait a minute. Here's a couple of clips from YT comedy group Fried Nothing Television friednothing


Micgar said...

Lockwood-you came close in imitating the style, and the passion of "Anonymous" but...it's one of a kind. I mn its 2 funy lik rly!

Lockwood said...

It really is a work of art, isn't it? Anonymous Pwns! or Rewlz! or something...

bubbles said...

migar and lockwood: Thanks for the laugh!! Oh, oh, and you too, anon, you too.


I had a life changing experience with a medium a couple of years ago... but I would never expect anyone to understand or believe without it happening to them. My BFF's husband also had a freaky and unexplainable experience with the same medium the same day (his wife forced him to go). Anyway, the poor guy was dumbfounded and was trying to figure out explanations for what happened for days... I simply accepted that there is no way to know for sure without dying, so I'm o.k. with waiting for a while to know for sure. :-)

Micgar said...

Bubbles-thanks for stopping in-and glad it gave you a laugh!
Yeah-I know people who are really into the spiritual and ethereal part. Everybody has their own lives and way of thinking about their lives. Anyway, these shows seem to be exploiting that part. Ur 2 kewl 4 lvng tha cmt!

bubbles said...

Yeah, the shows are stupid. I've only seen them for a minute here and there, but it doesn't take long to know they are stupid!